pregnancy moments

[kcobweb]

I miss my old body, the one I had the first 31 years of my life. This loaner body I have currently is fine, and often fascinating and amazing - but just not the same. I am insanely jealous of people who are wearing normal real jeans - with flies and buttons and zippers and pockets and things. My old body could do some things that were cool and fun sometimes.

She had the hiccups this morning - the second time I've noticed that. It's just enough movement to be distracting. It is a rhythmic pulse and feels like she's knocking or something.

I was reading in bed this morning, and decided to get up - and stood too quickly. There was much moaning and groaning (which is pretty common for me when I first stand these days - it's always a little crampy and painful). galagan started laughing at me and the racket I was making. I said: "Whoops, I forgot and stood up too fast." He: "That's not too bright." Me: "I'm sorry, darling - I know you were hoping for a smart baby, but things don't look too good for her genetically."

I realize every so often that when I imagine having the baby actually here, I always picture her sleeping, eating, or crying. I usually fail to remember that occasionally she might be both awake and happy at the same time. I know newborns don't require a lot of entertainment or additional stimulation, but this idea freaks me out a little bit for some reason. I think this is partly because I'm trying to steel myself for the horrible parts, and forgetting that there might be good parts too. Do I need psychological preparation for the good parts? I suppose they will be easier to adapt to, so perhaps I'll be okay.

ETA: galagan panicked yesterday because February only has *4* weeks in it, and therefore my due date is actually a week closer than he had thought.... *grin* Yes, 5 weeks to go. Or rather, 4 weeks 4 days. (Till the due date, not till the birth.)

Comments

[kassrachel.livejournal.com]

Four weeks, four days -- wow. Nutty. :-)

I suppose if you're only going to steel yourself for one aspect of parenting, it probably makes sense to steel yourself for the unhappy-baby bits; the happy-baby part will be more fun and easier to adapt to. At least, that's my guess. :-)

[rivka.livejournal.com]

We do have weird bodies, all right. Cool, yes, but remember when you could slip through narrow spaces? And bend?

I realize every so often that when I imagine having the baby actually here, I always picture her sleeping, eating, or crying. I usually fail to remember that occasionally she might be both awake and happy at the same time. I know newborns don't require a lot of entertainment or additional stimulation, but this idea freaks me out a little bit for some reason.

For all the other states you mention, there's something obvious to do: (a) don't wake her up, (b) feed her, (c) feed her, change her, rock her, or otherwise comfort her. It's not immediately obvious what you should do with a baby who's just, you know, looking at you expectantly.

I bet it will come naturally, though.

[journeywoman.livejournal.com]

Re: the awake-yet-happy moments--it's astonishing how happy a smile can make you. There's so little emotional payoff otherwise for all the work you do, or at least I feel that way, but just one smile can make you forget the irritability and exhaustion. I loved Evan before then, but when he smiled unmistakably at me last week, I fell in love--and after two months of vaguely wondering if I just sort of lacked a maternal instinct, that was a surprise.